Introverted Bear

I read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey and loved it in high school, so I thought I'd give this one a try. I'm very disappointed so far...This book is truly frustrating.

Overall:
Covey's suggestions seem very type A and a little nuts. I don't want to live my life like this. It seems very stressful, and the effort is not worth the results. Acting in a good enough way and practicing self-compassion would be better than stressing myself out to live like he suggests. We're not always self-aware, and sometimes we just have to forgive our mistakes because to err is human. I guess I'm on the low end of all these habits, and I'm okay with that.

His habits do seem to come out of a Puritan discipline tradition. Sorry, I'm Catholic. Can't help it. Must be the Mary worshiping that causes me to lack these habits (yes, that was a joke). If anything, I think his habits are a combination of character and personality ethics, and not solely character ethics.

I'm starting to think that we shouldn't work on ourselves first and then work with others. We can't separate those two things or else we end up missing out on part of our lives. We need to work on both, realizing our traits/actions need changing and also still connecting with others at the same time. If we have one without the other, I feel like we stunt our growth. It's false that we can't work on both at the same time.

Whether or not these habits constitute "effectiveness" probably depends on your personality. It seems like people who are more introverted, more agreeable, more conscientious, and less neurotic will do well with these habits. I'm also willing to bet that those who are introverted, intuitive, feeling, and thinking may also do extremely well. Otherwise, this book is very idealistic and not realistic. Most of these habits will be hard to accomplish, no matter who you are, and I'm just not sure the effort is worth the trouble.

I can't help but think that the quadrants are probably a little related to personality traits. When he described quadrant II as something that you think and prepare for, he reminded me of the description of introverts given by Laurie A. Helgoe. Perhaps some introverts are better suited for working in quadrant II and some extroverts work better in quadrant I. That's not based on time management skills but on personal preferences. This probably has more to do with how you process stimuli in your brain than anything else. Until I see studies on this, I'm going to take Covey's suggestions with a grain of salt.

Covey's book has graphs and questions for you to ponder over if that's your sort of thing. I admit that I didn't read the questions, and I skipped over them because I hated the way the 7 habits were presented. Covey seems pompous, privileged, and at times on a very high horse. The 7 habits are very unrealistic, idealistic, and abstract. They're more based on philosophy, religion, and anecdotes, not on psychological studies. It'd be different if he found psychological theories to support his habits, but I'm not so sure psychology supports them. I think psychology will only support them in certain circumstances, but not always. I don't his habits are necessarily wrong, but I also think there's gotta be a better way or a better explanation than the ones that Covey gives.

Point is, if you don't care for data and don't mind abstract perspectives created from privileged personal experiences, then this book might be for you. I think this book would be great material for a comedy sketch. People who practice the seven habits are sitting on their high horses, going nowhere, because their horses are actually made of statues that represent idealistic horses and aren't real horses that actually move. And yet, he lectures me from atop his high horse, telling me everything that I need to do to live an effective life. I'll just shake my head and keep walking, leaving him behind and up to his own devices.

Then he will turn to his friend on the other high horse besides him. They'll converse and share deep, deep feelings within. "Oh, the feels!" They cling to each other and cry their hearts out! But...one of them leans too far and falls off the horse. We hear a sickening CRACK-- "Uh, a little help here?" His friend calls from the ground. *curtain drops*